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I Shall Scream


WIDOW CORNEY

(spoken) You're a cruel man. And a hardhearted man besides.

MR. BUMBLE

(spoken) Hardhearted, Mrs. Corney? Hard? Are you hardhearted, Mrs. Corney?

WIDOW CORNEY

(spoken) Dear me! What a curious question coming from a single man.
What can you want to know
for, Mr. Bumble? Mr. Bumble, I shall scream!

MR. BUMBLE

No you wouldn't, heigh ho.
If I wanted something special,
Then you couldn't say "no".
Did I nearly catch you smiling?
Yes I did. And it's beguiling.
If you hand is close, I'll press it.
Yes, you like it -- come confess it!
Yes, you do...

WIDOW CORNEY

No, I don't.

MR. BUBLE

Yes, you do!

WIDOW CORNEY

I shall scream! I shall scream!
'Til they hasten to my rescue, I shall scream.

MR. BUMBLE

Since there's nobody that's near us
Who cold see us. or could hear us?
If you ask you can I kiss you
Say what will my pretty miss do?

WIDOW CORNEY

I shall scream, scream, scream!

MR. BUMBLE

If I pinch you one pinch --
From you shy protective shell
Can I un-inch you one inch?
Will my blinthesome, buxum beauty
Let her suitor do his duty?
Tho' his lap ain't very large, dear
Sit upon it -- There's no charge, dear.
Will you sit?

WIDOW CORNEY

No, I shan't

MR. BUMBLE

Will you sit?

WIDOW BUMBLE

I shall scream! I shall scream!
For the safety of my virtue I shall sream
Tho' your knee is rather cosy,
See my cheeks are getting rosy.
You would have me in your power.
If I sat here for an hour...

MR. BUMBLE

I shall scream, scream, scream!

WIDOW CORNEY

You're a naughty bad man.
If you think I can't be proper,
Prim and haughty -- I can
And you'll pardon if I mention
You must state your true intention.

MR. BUMBLE

Is there not another room here?

WIDOW CORNEY

No!

MR. BUMBLE

If there would be a bride and groom here --- would there be?

WIDOW CORNEY

Well there might.

MR. BUMBLE

We shall see.

WIDOW CORNEY

I shall scream! I shall scream!
At the thought of what you're thinking, I shall scream!

MR. BUMBLE

You will wonder where the scream went
When we come to an agreement
As my lovey-dovey is chubby
Could she love a chubby hubby?

WIDOW CORNEY

I shall scream, Mr. Bumble!
I shall scream, Bumble-Wumble!
I shall scream, scream, scream!
   
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