I Wants To Be The Leading Lady

(Words by George Totten Smith / George Fairman, 1901)

Miss Arabella Snow, upon the stage would go, a man engaged her
'cause she was good looking, at fifteen dollars "per."
said she "Excuse me sir, for leading roles of course with you I'm booking,"
"The leading lady, eh?" said he "well in this play,
you'll lead the march and say, the coach is waiting,"
to Arabella Snow, it was an awful blow but she replied with smile most captivating.

She quickly won his heart, and got the leading part,
to star her in the piece was his intention, until one day he met,
a frolic-some soubrette, and straight away he paid her marked attention,
he gave her every song, he made her parts so strong,
that Arabella's part was just a "feeder," then Arabella Snow said,
"That soubrette must go we've got one leading lady so don't need her."

I wants to be the leading lady, I wants to play the real star parts,
make no mistake man, I knows how to act if you give me a chance
you will see it's a fact, I'll make Bernhardt look like thirty cents.
I wants to be the leading lady, I don't want no thinking part that's shady,
I've got to have all the comedy lines
and the center of the stage where the calcium shines,
I wants to be the leading lady."